


Hang Around and You Might Have Some Fun

by Batshit_Bogs



Series: Through the Mirror [4]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Damian Wayne and Maya Ducard are basically siblings, Damian and his friends are little shits, Humor, Injury, Mild Blood, Reverse Robins, Whumptober 2020, an attempt at comedy, i feel bad for the villain, kind of, no beta we die like robins, no one should have to deal with them, the one time i actively try whump and over half of it is comedy, this was weirdly hard to write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:54:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26760223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batshit_Bogs/pseuds/Batshit_Bogs
Summary: “Y’know, when you said you wanted to hang out this weekend, this isn’t really what I expected.”Damian cranes his head so that he can glare at Maps over his shoulder. “I’m inclined to agree with Nobody.”“Do you guys really think this is what I meant?” Maps says. “My ideal weekend usually doesn’t include being hung over a vat of acid.”-A rising criminal decides it's a good idea to capture Nobody, Tracker, and Nightwing. That's his mistake, really.
Relationships: Damian Wayne & Maya Ducard & Mia "Maps" Mizoguchi & Kathy Branden & Jonathan Samuel Kent
Series: Through the Mirror [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1937332
Comments: 4
Kudos: 177





	Hang Around and You Might Have Some Fun

**Author's Note:**

> I got really lazy with this lmao. It's more of a character study than a serious thing. That, and I just wanted to have Damian, Maps, and Maya fucking with some poor villain.
> 
> Damian is 18, and so are his teammates, give or take a year
> 
> This would be Whumptober prompt no.1, hanging
> 
> **CW**  
>  _\- mild blood  
>  -mild injury description  
> \- language_
> 
> lemme know if I missed anything

“Y’know, when you said you wanted to hang out this weekend, this isn’t really what I expected.”

Damian cranes his head so that he can glare at Maps over his shoulder. “I’m inclined to agree with Nobody.”

“Do you guys _really_ think this is what I meant?” Maps says. “My ideal weekend usually doesn’t include being hung over a vat of acid.”

“I don’t know,” Maya says, “you’re into some pretty weird shit.”

Maps wriggles, jostling the three of them. “I’m sure as crap not into _bondage!”_

“You two are disgusting,” Damian says.

“Oho, Nightwing, you do _not_ want me to bring up your browser history.”

“What were you doing in my phone?”

“Bored-fueled investigation.” 

“What was on his browser history?” Maya asks with barely contained glee. 

“Girl, you really don’t want to know.”

“If you three are quite done,” the villain of the week drawls as he slides into view. He’s some idiot that calls himself ‘The Suspender’. His signature is, you guessed it, suspending people over water, acid, or in a high place. The Titans have been tracking him down for several weeks to no avail. For as un-elegant as his methods are, Damian has to (grudgingly) admit that he has some skill.

After all, not just anyone can successfully ambush and subdue Nightwing, Nobody, and Tracker.

“We’re not, actually,” Maya says. “So, Tracker, you were saying?”

“Nothing about my browser history,” Damian deadpans. 

Maps hums in mock-thought. “I dunno, there _was_ some pretty juicy stuff…”

“I wasn’t asking,” Suspender says. He crosses his green-clad arms - his costume looks Riddler-inspired.

“What’ll it take to get you to spill?” Maya asks, ignoring him. 

“That is an _excellent_ question.” Maps’ smile is audible. “A better question is what it’ll take for Nightwing to get me to keep my mouth shut?”

“Hey!” Suspender waves his arms from his place next to the vat, as if that will get their attention. It’s an odd perspective, watching him hop around upside down.

“Here’s what - I won’t eviscerate you,” Damian says.

“Tempting. However, your threat is empty, and I’m a poor college student.”

Maya tries to kick Maps, and gets both her and Damian’s ankles with her heel. “Dude. Secret identities.”

“ _Please,”_ Maps scoffs, “it’s not that hard to tell that we’re college age, and by the way, there are literally _thousands_ of college students in this city alone.”

She has a point - none of them even _go_ to college in San Francisco. They could be literally anyone among millions. Not that Suspender would consider such a thing - Damian suspects he doesn’t think much.

“That’s a shitty -” Maya’s retort cuts off as the chain they’re suspended from drops. Damian’s entire body tenses as his friends cry out, but can’t contain a grunt as they jerk to a stop significantly closer to the acid than before. The only thing saving their scalps is the low level of the bubbling green liquid. Damian grimaces and rolls his sore shoulders as best he can. 

“Do I have your attention now?” Suspender asks from where he’s standing by a control panel.

Maya heaves a sigh. “Fine. _Yes,_ you have our attention.”

“Speak for yourself,” Damian mutters, and gets a kick from both his friends. 

“Let's get this over with,” Maps says quietly, then louder, “what do you want, you cheap Riddler knockoff?”

Ah, so she noticed the similarities too.

“I am _not_ a Riddler knockoff! Nygma is a pathetic fool.”

“You know him?” Damian asks. 

Suspender tosses his long blond hair back and scoffs. “We went to college together, if you must know.”

Damian rolls his eyes. “Fucking fantastic. I take it you’re jealous of his rogue status?”

“Of course not!” Suspender strides up to the vat to point at him. “His little ‘riddle’ schtick isn’t supervillain worthy! I, The Suspender, am a _much_ more worthy adversary of -”

Maps fake-snores loudly, making him falter.

Suspender shoots her a glare and continues, “-of the Titans and all who dare oppose -”

Maps snores louder. Damian bites his lip and looks away from Suspender to hide a smile as Maya snickers.

He stares at her incredulously as she ‘wakes up’ with a snort and says, “Huh? What? Oh, sorry, you were just -” she fake yawns “- _soooo_ boring.”

“Do not mock me, you insolent child! Your lives hang in the very balance here!”

“Was that pun intentional?” Damian asks. “It was terrible.”

“I...what? No! And I’ll have you know I’m _excellent_ at puns.”

“I bet the crowd just _eats_ you up,” Maps says with a nod at the acid. Maya outright laughs, and Damian lets out a chuckle.

“Hey, why are you laughing at her pun? It didn’t even make any sense!”

“Now I can see why Nygma became a supervillain and you didn’t,” Maya says. “Lackin’ a bit of brain power there, buddy?”

“I’m smarter than Nygma will ever be! He’s a childish fool!”

“Okay, but at least he’s entertaining,” Maps says.

Damian knows exactly what his teammates are doing. No doubt they can feel him sawing away at the chains he can reach with his serrated chain cutter. That, and the more _enhanced_ members of their team are surely on their way.

Oh, and Suspender is a surprising amount of fun to rile up.

“Nightwing, remember that one time he kidnapped us just to play a game of chess?” 

“He what?” Maya gasps.

Damian nods. “Of course I do. Once we beat him he let us go without a fuss.”

“But we did stay and play a few more rounds.”

“It was a...somewhat enjoyable evening.”

“Man.” Maps clicks her tongue. “I wonder how he’s doing.”

“Stop talking about him!” Suspender shrieks. “He isn’t the one who kidnapped you!”

“Yes, thanks for that, by the way,” Maya says. She whispers to her teammates, “You two are _so_ telling that story later.”

“Why _did_ you kidnap us?” Maps asks Suspender.

Damian cuts through one chain - it isn’t enough to free any of them, so he gets to work on the next as they pretend nothing changed. At least it wasn’t the main chain. It wouldn’t do to drop them into the acid prematurely.

“To kill you, of course,” Suspender says casually, gesturing to the vat. “I thought it was obvious.”

“Clear as day, actually,” Maya says, “but _why?_ You could’ve just nerfed us while we were knocked out.”

“I chained you up because -” 

“Did you want a pun battle?” Maps asks.

“Or maybe to give a long winded explanation of what drove you to villainy?” Maya offers.

“Opportunity to gloat,” Damian suggests.

Suspender makes a choking motions at them. “You three are _insufferable.”_

“Thank you,” Maps says with exaggerated sincerity. 

“We try our best,” Damian says.

“So anyway,” Maya interrupts, “what were you saying? Something about why you haven’t killed us yet?”

Suspender narrows his eyes. “Yes, I was explaining how -”

“Oh, wait! We don’t care.”

“That is IT!” Suspender slams his hand down on the control panel, and for a heart stopping moment Damian thinks _this is it._ Nothing happens though - Suspender's hand missed the button by inches.

“How close are you to freeing us?” Maya whispers.

Damian scowls as he struggles to twist his wrists in the right way to saw at the metal. The chains are digging into his skin through the material of his gauntlets, not to mention how much his shoulders hurt from bearing his weight for so long. The ends of his limbs are starting to go numb, and the blood rushing to his head is giving him a headache. No doubt his friends are experiencing the same effects. 

“Not close enough,” he whispers back.

“I have had it with you children,” Suspender says. “I have tried so hard to get you here, and now you compare me to NYGMA and won’t even _listen!_ Were you raised under a ROCK?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Damian deadpans.

“This isn’t a joke!”

“I’m entirely serious.”

“Gah!” Suspender kicks the vat. “I’m three seconds away from letting the chain go.”

“But then you’d never have the satisfaction of us knowing why we died,” Maya says.

“You three have made it exceedingly difficult to rise as a villain,” Suspender blurts before any of them can interrupt. “I’m waiting until your super pals get here, so that I can crush their spirits by killing you in front of them!”

Ah. That’s a classic move, truly. Damian and his friends have been in predicaments like this many times.

Maps nods. “Okay, that’s a decent reason. But _why?”_

“Once their spirits are crushed, they’ll be too devastated to act! Then me and my men -”

“My men and I,” Damian corrects.

“Shut the fuck up! Seriously, shut up!” Suspender shouts. He takes a deep breath and runs his hands through his hair before continuing. “We will swoop in and take them out, once and for all. Then San Francisco will be mine!”

Somehow it sounds way lamer than ‘Gotham will be mine’, or ‘Metropolis will be mine’. Even ‘Star City will be mine’ sounds better.

“And you felt the need to kill several people before this why…?” Maya asks.

“To build my reputation, of course.”

“Oh, yeah, _of course_.”

“Well, sorry to say, but your plan sucks,” Maps says. 

Suspender crosses his arms. “What makes you say that?”

“For one, you _clearly_ haven’t done your research. If you kill us now...big yikes. You’re basically writing your own death sentence.”

“You’re trying to get out of this.”

“Just stating facts. I mean, killing me and Nobody, yeah, that’ll get our friends mad.” Maps laughs with faux nervousness. “But kill _Nightwing?_ Right in front of Flamebird?”

Damian pauses in his sawing to elbow her. If he could cut _faster,_ he wouldn’t have to listen to this.

She elbows back as Suspender asks, more meekly than before, “How do you mean?”

“Sus - can I call you Sus?”

“No.”

“Well, Sus,” Maps says, “Nightwing and Flamebird? Birds of a feather. Childhood friends. _Everyone_ knows that if you so much as touch Nightwing, Flamebird is gonna be on your ass, and he’s gonna be _livid.”_

She’s right, and Damian hates it. Jon has always been a tad protective of him, which can be annoying in battle. He ignores the part of him that is quietly pleased.

“So imagine what happens if you _kill_ Nightwing right in front of him. Flamebird has never killed before, but I think he might just make an exception for you.”

Jon would never kill, Damian knows. Not for any reason. He breaks through another chain, and Maya inhales sharply. He can feel them flex their wrists - they’re free. Now they’re just waiting on his signal.

“Tracker is right,” he says. “Flamebird wouldn’t be pleased, not that you’ll find out. We have no intention of dying tonight.”

They spring into action. Suspender yelps as Maya goes invisible and Maps kicks off of Damian’s back to leap over the vat. The motion makes Damian swing, blurring his view of the slight shimmer of Maya right before Suspender is sent flying right into Maps’ left hook. 

Suspender slams into the ground and shrieks, “They’ve broken free! Assistance!”

Damian can hear a door slam open, followed by the pounding of _many_ boots against the warehouse floor. He grits his teeth and forces his wrists to bend to their limit to get to work on his own chains. 

“Nightwing, get out of there!” Maya cries from somewhere in the melee. Damian wishes he could see how the fight was going.

A chain breaks - Damian doesn’t fall, but his arms are free. He breathes a small sigh of relief. He could have easily cut the main chain, and then he’d be dissolving in acid. He turns himself so that he can see the fight, then saws at the chains around his body as hard as he can.

“I’m almost free,” he says, “keep them busy!”

“What the crap do you _think_ we’ve been doing?” Maps snaps. She throws her shuriken-hairpin at Suspender, catching him in the hand before he can push the button that would kill Damian.

Unfortunately, despite Suspender’s pained scream, he presses the button.

Fortunately, Damian cuts himself free at that exact moment.

Also fortunately, Flamebird and Beacon burst into the warehouse.

Damian’s heart leaps into his throat as he twists in midair, plummeting towards the acid. There’s a few terrified screams, a furious roar, and the sound of something exploding as he whips his knife out of his belt and plunges it into the interior wall of the vat. It drags through the metal with a horrible _screech,_ and he bunches into a ball around the hilt as he stutters to a stop right above the acid. 

A bubble pops next to him and splatters his cape. Damian grits his teeth against the specks of acid that eat through his cape, uniform, and into his lower back. It isn’t too painful, but he can already tell it’ll scar.

Damian unhooks his grapple from his belt, fires it at the ceiling, and shoots out of the vat. He releases it, stashes both it and his knife in one fluid motion, and dives at the battle.

“Nightwing!” Maps cries, beaming at him as she kicks a thug in the face. There’s a startling amount of them, which might be cause for concern.

Damian throws smoke bombs into the crowd before hitting the ground in a roll. He comes up among haze and confusion, and leaps at the opportunity to take down three thugs in rapid succession. One of them makes a lazy pass with a lead pipe. He easily wrenches it out of their grasp and cracks it across their jaw.

“Where’s Suspender?” he snarls, dropping the pipe to punch a thug hard enough to knock them out. He would like to have a few words with Nygma’s old schoolmate. 

“Flamebird’s got him,” Kathy says. She sends two thugs’ weapons flying with a wave of her hands, then cracks their heads together.

Hopefully Jon isn’t _too_ mad about Suspender dropping Damian into acid. At least he’ll subdue the idiot villain.

Damian ducks a punch, kicks one thug into another, then swings another at Kathy so that she can slam him into the vat. In a few moments all of the thugs are unconscious among dropped weapons, blood splatters, and dissipating tendrils of smoke. 

Maya materializes next to him and punches his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re not dead, asshole.”

“Same here,” Maps says. She squeezes Damian in a brief hug, which he doesn’t return. He might later, should it happen again, but Nightwing doesn’t do hugs. 

“It would be rather pathetic if I had allowed myself to be killed,” he says. Kathy rolls her eyes.

“Unhand me!”

They turn towards the exit, where Jon (sporting a disturbingly dark scowl) is dragging Suspender back into the building.

“I swear, you will feel my wrath!” Suspender yells, flailing. Even from this distance Damian can see a discolored bruise on his face, and the fact that his words are slurred only adds to the suggestion that Jon punched him. Hard. Damian allows himself satisfaction.

Jon catches sight of him, and the scowl morphs into a blinding smile. He drops Suspender, and the next second he’s lifting Damian off of the ground in a bone-crushing hug.

“You’re okay!” he crows.

Damian rolls his eyes at the face squished against his chest. He awkwardly pats Jon’s elbow - it’s the most he can move his limbs from where they’re pinned to his sides. “Yes, I’m alive, you can let go now.”

Further back in the warehouse Kathy has Suspender immobilized with her telekinesis while Maya ties him up. He’s yelling obscenities and empty threats. Maps is working on zip-tying the thugs, though she shoots Damian a suggestive wink.

He flushes. “Flamebird, _put me down.”_

Jon gives him one last squeeze (Damian does _not_ squeak) before setting him on the ground. Damian takes a big step back and huffs as he smooths out nonexistent wrinkles in his uniform. He tries not to let his blush deepen at how Jon is _still_ smiling at him.

“I called the cops,” Maya says as she and Kathy rejoin them. “We should probably dip before they get here.”

Damian nods. “Any injuries to report?”

Maps dusts off her hands and steps on a thug on her way over. “My wrists and arms are a little sore, but other than that I’m good.”

“Same here,” Maya says. “Nothing a warm bath won’t fix.”

Damian turns his assessing gaze on Jon and Kathy. “You two?”

“I’m good,” Jon says as Kathy shakes her head. “What about you?”

“Tt.” Damian holds his tattered cape up. “Other than needing a new cape, I am unharmed.”

Kathy raises an eyebrow. “And the acid that got through your uniform?”

_Damn telepaths._

“The _what?”_ Maps and Jon gasp. 

Maya rolls her eyes with a mutter of, “Typical.”

Damian glares at them and pulls his hood up. “It was a few drops, nothing to fret over.” He brushes past them and grapples to a window. He pauses briefly enough to make sure they’re following, then swings into the night air as sirens approach. 

“At least let me carry you,” Jon says as he catches up.

“Absolutely not.” Damian can ignore the slight burn where the acid got him. As soon as they get back to base he’ll clean the wounds, wrap them, and that’ll be that.

“C’mon, you’re hurt.”

“Just let him carry you,” Mays says from her place in Kathy’s arms. Maps nods as she swings next to them. 

Damian grapples over another building and snaps, “I said _no._ ”

He can feel Jon staring, probably with that stupidly adorable lost-puppy expression, but he ignores him. Damian really doesn’t want to be carried or coddled at the moment. 

Thankfully they all shut up for the remainder of the trip back to base.

As soon as they get to the balcony Damian stalks away down one of the many hallways. Once he’s out of sight, he lets his shoulders slump.

Tonight was too close for comfort. 

He sweeps into the medical bay, taking off his gauntlets and domino as he goes. He tosses them onto one of the cots. The skin encircling his wrists have been rubbed raw and bloody - they’ll need to be bandaged. Next he takes off his hooded cape and holds it out to examine it, scowling at the tattered hem and holes in the fabric.

Making a new cape is a pain in the ass - it involves calling Father, which he wants to avoid. Especially with the _replacement_ skittering around. Perhaps he can contact Pennyworth discreetly, or ask Duke for a favor. 

Damian tosses the cape over the gauntlets and domino, then puts his belt next to the pile. He tries not to wince as he peels the top of his uniform off. The fabric sticks to the acid wounds and tears some more skin off in the process of removing it. 

He stands with his back to the mirror and looks at the injuries over his shoulder.

They’re small and bloody, but the look of them confirms his suspicions - he has a few more scars to add to the collection. It’s too bad they didn’t land over the League brand seared into the small of his back. 

“That doesn’t look like nothing.”

Damian turns his glare on Maya before striding to one of the supply cabinets. “You know I’ve had much worse.”

She raises an unimpressed eyebrow. “I’d dignify that with a response, but we’ve had this conversation so many times that you know what I’d say.

_That doesn’t make your current injury less important._

“Tt.” Damian takes out a bottle of antiseptic, some cotton balls, large tweezers, and a roll of bandages. He soaks a cotton ball in the antiseptic, picks it up with the tweezers, and stands in front of the mirror again to dap the ball against the acid wounds. 

“I could help,” Maya says when he winces for the third time. “I’ll take care of those, and you take care of your wrists.”

“Aren’t your wrists raw as well?”

“Nah. I wasn’t rubbing them against the chains like you were.” Maya plucks the tweezers from his grasp and waves them at a bed. “Sit down.”

Damian rolls his eyes, but sits. Maya takes a seat behind him and continues cleaning his wounds as he starts on wrapping his wrists. They work in quiet harmony, save for the moments when he snaps at her for pressing too hard, and she snaps back. Other than that, it’s peaceful. 

At some point Maps appears in the doorway to say, “We’re getting the conversation pit ready. Do you guys want popcorn?”

“Hell yes,” Maya says.

“Damian?”

“Might as well.”

Maps grins. “Cool beans. Come on out when you’re ready.” She ducks behind the wall.

A little while later, Maya says, “I think they’re clean enough. They’ve stopped bleeding, at least.”

Damian grunts and stands up to wrap bandages around his lower torso. The stark white material stands out against his dark skin, and he frowns at it. He’s never liked the contrast, like it broadcasts the fact that he’s injured to the world.

“I’ll get you a hoodie while you,” Maya pokes him in the chest, “bring your uniform to the vault.”

“Get me something reasonable,” he says as she skips out of the room. 

“No promises!”

Damian sighs. She’ll probably get him that ridiculous bat-themed pullover Cassandra got him as a joke last year. 

He gathers his discarded uniform pieces in his arms and makes the journey to the Tower basement, where the uniforms are kept. He opens his locker and trades the armor for the t-shirt and sweats he always keeps ready. Maya comes down by the time he’s changed out of the rest of his uniform.

“Here you go,” she chirps as she tosses him a hoodie.

It doesn’t look like the bat one, so he shrugs it on without investigating. It’s larger than his usual wardrobe, which is odd, but he’s too tired to really look at it. All he wants to do is curl up and pass out. 

Maya bites her lip in a pathetic attempt to keep from smiling. Damian gives her an odd look as they make the journey up to the common room floor. She shrugs and whistles suspiciously, but Damian just doesn’t have the energy to press. 

The conversation pit is already filled with blankets, pillows, friends, and bowls of popcorn when they reach the common room. It’s tradition for them all to have a ‘sleepover’ after near-misses and difficult patrols/missions. Damian always pretends like he hates it, but he knows that they know he secretly loves it. 

“Welcome to the pit!” Colin cheers. He springs out of the pile of blankets to jog over and give Damian a hug. “Sorry I wasn’t there tonight, bro. Things got busy on the other side of town - Wally went home early.”

Damian allows the hug to go on for five seconds before pulling back. “We had it covered.”

“Really? Cause I heard you nearly fell into acid.”

“He did,” Maya says as she brushes past them. She wriggles into the pit between Kathy and Maps and immediately sets into the popcorn.

Damian rolls his eyes. “I had it under control.” 

“Is that my hoodie?” Jon says, cutting off whatever Colin was about to say. He’s staring at Damian with a strange expression.

Damian looks down at what he’s wearing.

Ah, fuck. It _is_ Jon’s.

He shoots a glare at Maya, who’s acting suspiciously casual.

“I asked Maya to retrieve a hoodie for me,” he says slowly, narrowing his eyes, “I should’ve checked what she brought me.”

“Well, too late now,” Maps says breezily, smiling with the innocence of the devil. “We’re gonna watch Dreamworks, get your butts in here.”

Damian pointedly does _not_ look at Jon as he wedges himself into a corner of the conversation pit. He drags a blanket over himself until only his head is poking out. Jon sits right next to him, and Colin lays out at everyone’s feet. 

Despite the hyper-awareness that he’s wearing Jon’s hoodie, Damian can feel himself unwinding. Although messing with Suspender had been fun, the second part of the confrontation had been...less so. He didn’t even know how tense he was until now. 

He pulls his knees up to his chest and burrows his nose into the hoodie as the first movie starts. It’s some inane film about cavemen.

“It’s peak animation,” Kathy says.

“Yeah, right,” Colin snorts. “I doubt anything can top Madagascar.”

“Um, Kung Fu Panda?” Maya says. 

“You mean Megamind,” Maps counters.

Jon points at her. “Yes! Megamind is the _best.”_

“Dude, really?” Colin says. “It’s literally a parody on your dad and Metropolis.”

“Okay, point, but it’s so _good.”_

“Nothing can top Megamind,” Maps agrees.

Damian closes his eyes, letting their words and the movie’s sounds wash over him. He breathes in the scent of Jon’s laundry detergent. It’s a comforting smell that he is far more familiar with than he should be. He can already feel sleep tugging at him, and for once he gives in without a fight. 

Well into the movie, Jon slings his arm over him and lets Damian use him as a pillow. Their friends tease Jon, and snap pictures, but Damian doesn’t wake up.

He’s safe, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> This originally ended with Maya and Dami having a small argument, and Dami isolating himself in his room, but it felt clunky. That and Dami deserves nice things. And I got really lazy and just said 'fuck it, post'
> 
> Also - Wally as in Wallace West
> 
> Whack me with a broom @ [Batshit-Birds](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/batshit-birds) on Tumblr


End file.
